ENOUGH SENSE TO GET OUT OF THE RAIN & INTO THE BLUE-STRIPED TEMPLE “Don’t you feel like you can take on the world?You ain’t worried ’bout nobody sneak dissin”‘ – Rae Sremmurd “We’ll make Heaven […]
Category: Weird Boners
‘AMER’ AS A REPRESENTATION OF OUR PSYCHOSEXUAL OBSESSION WITH DEATH
“Love, art thou sweet? then bitter death must be;Love, thou art bitter; sweet is death to me.O Love, if death be sweeter, let me die.” — Alfred, Lord Tennyson As a major motion picture, Amer […]
SIDESTROKE BUDDIES: On sexual naivete in Mario Bava’s ‘Hercules in the Haunted World’
“With the boys forget the girls / Boys with boys, girls get with the girls and / The boys with the boys / It’s only right and natural” — The Frogs It is amusing that […]
Brian De Palma’s Body Double: Shrewd Metatextual Masterpiece or Shameless Masturbatory Piece?
In a time when sexuality is frowned upon in a country already well-known for its puritanical attitudes, I’m shocked filmmaker Brian De Palma hasn’t been dragged away by an angry mob in a flurry of […]
‘BABY DOLL’: THE 1956 FILM for fans of JOHN WATERS
The first movie I intended to write about for this edition of “Weird Boners” was A Dirty Shame. I’ve been wanting to revisit John Waters’ films, and Tracey Ullman stuck a bottle of water up her […]
VICIOUSLY SEXY MERMAIDS: EROTIC VIOLENCE IN ‘THE LURE’
Before I dive headfirst into my Weird Boner selection (it’s about mermaids, so “dive”, get it?), I need to begin with my introduction to the phrase “weird boners” itself. I used to co-host a podcast […]
BE FRUITFUL: ‘SPECIES’ (1995) TACKLES THE SCARY AND THE SEXY OF (IN)HUMAN REPRODUCTION
Given that it’s ostensibly what sex is for, it’s surprising how the act of impregnation is the source of so much psychosexual drama. I know for most men, the thought of knocking someone up you […]
DIE, OR GET LAID TRYING (ON THE ROLE OF HORROR SHAPING ’90S SOFT-CORE)
Do successful horror films grow into franchises, or are they genetically bound to the insatiable libido of culture, forcing them to evolve into soft-core porn? While longevity among any horror brand has both its inevitable […]
PRETTY MAIDS ALL IN A ROW-DY 1970s SEX COMEDY
I first heard about Pretty Maids All In A Row from Anna Biller’s Twitter account. It’s evidence that everybody’s capable of giving you useful information at least once. This film caught my attention because it stars Rock […]
WHO DARES TO PROGRAM A PENILE IMPLANT DOUBLE FEATURE?
WEIRD BONERS IS DEDICATED TO ALL THE WEIRD WAYS FILMS AFFECT US SPIRITUALLY, INTELLECTUALLY, AND OF COURSE, PSYCHO-SEXUALLY Biopics are a strong contender for the worst sub-genre. They’re where bad filmmaking is not only allowed, […]
ADAM WINGARD’S ‘THE GUEST’ IS PURE CELLULOID BDE
Set during Halloween, Adam Wingard’s 2014 film The Guest may be confusing. That’s not meant in a “it’s so deep and mysterious, people don’t get it” kind of way; it’s that the film teeters between […]
TWO MOON JUNCTION HAS A LOT TO, UM, OFFER
WEIRD BONERS IS DEDICATED TO ALL THE WEIRD WAYS FILMS AFFECT US SPIRITUALLY, INTELLECTUALLY, AND OF COURSE, PSYCHO-SEXUALLY When it comes to weird boners, Two Moon Junction is in the hall of fame. It’s the type of […]
BLUE VELVET, and how david lynch made me a pervert
WEIRD BONERS IS DEDICATED TO ALL THE WEIRD WAYS FILMS AFFECT US SPIRITUALLY, INTELLECTUALLY, AND OF COURSE, PSYCHO-SEXUALLY Don’t blame me, blame David Lynch. In the late 1980s, my family and I lived in St. […]